Monday, March 28, 2011

p.s....


i'm holding Ashlyn listening to lil wayne while posting on this blog.
maybe i should start listening to baby advice
...she is kinda gangsta though
ha ha...dont tell dad :)

i need to clarify....

there is a reason i don't get paid to write my thoughts.
i have a very hard time conveying my full thoughts and i think sometimes just shooting out a portion of my thoughts makes me sound like an ass.

i don't hate all baby advice...and saying that i did - made me sound like a total jerk. I realized after the fact that a lot of credit should be paid to my friends, my sister, my mom and all the blogs i read too.

I stay away from annoying friends and annoying blogs - in reality, it just so happens that A LOT of what i know about babies and baby gear has been learned from other people. I actually forgot to mention one other book that i seriously read all the time - that has helped me to stay off of the psycho mom list at the pediatricians office....becasue without it - i think i would call that helpline 3 or 4 times a week. "What to expect the first year" is filled with facts that help you understand milestones and what you should expect as far as your baby's development goes...and knowing that stuff is important and not necessarily something that you just know on your own.

I really hope i didn't come off as a know-it-all mom.... i was only trying to make the point that books....and people..... that act like they know the one, only, and best way to raise your kid suck.

a good portion of all of my conversations with friends revolve around baby stuff.... and i love that. None of them are know-it-alls and i love hearing their suggestions. i also love reading about what other people are doing with their baby's online.

sooooo i hope that clears up my true feelings on the topic.
No more serious shit....my next post will be about my boobs.
:)
Stay tuned.

Friday, March 25, 2011

baby advice is annoying.


As of late, I am settling into my new routine as a stay-at-home-mom, but just this week started to integrate a few hours of work in as well. I have really lucked out working for some great people that are allowing me to continue working (on a much much smaller scale) from the comfort of my own little casa just so that i can kind of stay in the swing of things and have a few adult conversations throughout the day...all while wearing my pajamas and staring at ashlyn in the next room over of course! i am so fortunate for this situation, and i know it.

Anywyas, because i am now working a little bit I am focusing a little more on getting ashlyn on a schedule...a flexible one...but a schedule nonetheless. I had heard a ton about "babywise" so I downloaded it onto my kindle and i am about 1/2 way through it after the first day. Except for "what to expect when you are expecting" this was my first baby book. I was just looking for a bit of predictability when it comes to nap time so that i can schedule my work time accordingly.

I am soooo not the "i read books on raising children" kind of mom. Most of them i find to be so annoying and almost insulting to your intelligence - like it really freaks me out that someone had to write this stuff down because there are actually moms out there that just sooooo dont get it. But Babywise was sold to me as being a little different. It is about parents taking the lead and making decisions for their baby...but with some structure.

that was similar to my philosophy so i tried it.

Long story short.... it is what i was already doing but in a slightly different order.

the book tells you to feed your baby...play with your baby....and then let your baby sleep at 3 hour intervals.....except for night where you skip from feed to sleep.
Ummmm i go feed, sleep, play most of the time and it seems to work great, but apparently inverting the 2nd and 3rd activity in this cycle is where i go all wrong...according to the book if she was feed, play, sleeping she would be sleeping 9-11 hours straight at night.

really? i'm not buying it.
i just don't see how that little tweak will change her world.
i don't know though...maybe it will so i am (sort of) trying it....and i'll admit, i am trying it out of guilt.

Guilt sucks.

Ashlyn sleeps well right now - i get a five hour stretch from 10-3 and then she usually gets up to eat again at 5 and one last time at 7am. It is manageable and she goes right back to sleep when she does get up so honestly, I'm not complaining. i am not a zombie mom that is crazy that struggles through every day deprived of sleep. Our daytime routine is great too....even if she isnt napping she is super content to spend time in her bouncy chair while i make dinner, take a shower or sweep the floor (or whatever).

i guess i read the book for 2 reasons:
#1 improvement is never a bad thing
#2 i guess i wanted some kind of validation that what i was already doing was the best way

so i read the book.
bad idea.
not the book necessarily...but i realized that it is just soooo counter productive to look for validation anywhere besides paying attention to the fact that your baby is happy and content....And i think sooo many people make this mistake.

My feeling is that there should seriously be a disclaimer on all baby advice that says "listen to this only if you are smart enough and confident enough to totally dismiss it if it is going to make you crazy"

I have learned one thing after 3 months of being a mom that i care to pass along:
everyone (in the whole wide world) except for your baby will tell you that you should be doing something different and or better than what you have already done..... and it will make you CRAZY.

There. Thats it. That is my one piece of baby advice. My friend stacy told me this before i had ashlyn and it really was the one thing that made me feel super confident about being a mom. I do believe that you just figure it out. As long as you aren't some crazy meth head...as long as you have the desire to be a good mom....stay confident in your abilities, stay in charge....and you will succeed. Don't read books like they are the bible and don't pay attention to the crazy loads of unsolicited parenting advice unless you are truly ready to defend in your own mind that what you have already done is probably just fine. Oh, and learn to decipher between what interests you and what will just end up making you feel inadequate. forget the bad stuff and stay positive!


i am going to just keep doing what i am doing and hope for the best.
forget the books!... i don't have time for them in "my schedule" anyways lol...jk.

Monday, March 21, 2011

my boobs

yep you read right...this post is about boobs. They are the COO to my little CEO Ashlyn and they pretty much determine when and how everything happens in my life theses days.
i have not gone to bed, eaten breakfast, left the house, or brushed my teeth without first flashin a little boobage to the Boss...not even once in the last 16 weeks have they stayed put and behaved like they did for the 27 years prior to mommyhood. they were kind if useless and unimpressive before but i mean seriously...my life...and her life revolve around these puppies these days and that is why they are getting their own post on here.

my boobs have never felt so important.

And just to clarify, the boobs i am referring to aren't the old school boobs i used to sport - These are like big time boobs. They are the boobs i always thought i would spend $8,000 to achieve. They are a source of pride when i feel like i had to (at least temporarily) cash in the rest of my body so that i could have a healthy wonderful cute baby. Call me a weirdo but i do appreciate that when god taketh away a human sized waist he did giveth me with some bigger knockers to detract attention

They are little sources of nutrition for my baby and surprisingly artsy inspiration for me too ;)

After all the build up -I bet you want to see them right?

Well unfortunately for some - I am classy enough and smart enough to know that posting a picture of my boobs online is "bad" and not really my style. I'm just hoping (fingers crossed) that i haven't done something socially unacceptable by writing about them and posting this frosted version of "my other" boobs below :

Boobs are okay when they are artsy right?
yep. I did it. I bought flesh colored fondant and made boob cupcakes. That is how boob centered my life is these days.

Not because i am creepy and obsessed with myself.... but because i happened to handle the task of planning the menu and decor for my brother in laws Bachelor party that was hosted at my house a few weekends ago while i was staring at ummmmmmm my own boobs during a flashing/feeding session with Ash.

i struggled with finding what kind of decorations i could do that guys would actually appreciate and the answer was literally right in front of my face! BOOBS!!!! so regardless of the ridiculous tackyness of boobie cupcakes, i did it, and i think they liked them.