as of late....

the wonderful fabulous, genius, beautiful baby Amory and my sister Kristen came to visit.

And if only i didn't look like such a complete loser shlumpadinka who has given up on life these days...there would be more pictures of all of us.

Its getting rough people. I think that "cute pregnant lady" thing ended a few weeks back.
I am starting to really look BAD.

In my defense, i did have a pretty rough couple of days last week.
Some time on thursday at work i started to get this stabbing pain in my back. It kind of wrapped around to my front and ran along side the baby bump all the way to my hip. It hurt, but it wasn't horrible so i chalked it up to growing pains. We went to Pats parents house after work for a little bit and i started to feel nauseasous as it got worse. A few more hours passed by and it was still there and still getting worse so i called the doctor at like 9:30. We scheduled an appointment for the next morning but since i didn't have a fever and i wasn't technically doubled over in pain (yet) i just stayed put at home.

That night I didn't sleep and at one point after a trip to the bathroom I couldn't stop crying i was in so much pain. I went into the doctors frst thing on friday and they were convinced i have a kidney stone. The sent me for a renal ultrasound and did some other tests......my doctor also gave me this reassuring anectdote: "the good news is, you don't have to worry about having a baby now - lots of people say a kidney stone is worse"

wow. thank you?......that really isn't good news. Especially since apparently now i am faced with both situations.

She said that there was no way to tell when this would happen (passing the stone that is). It could happen in an hour, it could happen in a month. i just have to wait

But here is the weird part.... i waited and I really do feel better now. The pain has gone away. I don't know if that just happens or if the whole kidney stone thing is still waiting to happen and i am just getting a break ? My theory is that maybe i just passed a small stone on thursday and/or i have a super human tolerance for pain and i am done with this fiasco? orrrr the scaredy cat part of me thinks that maybe this is just the calm before the storm where i will supposedly be puking all over myself screaming for someone to kill me???

I t is all very unnerving. And yes that is a real description descriptionof the circumstances most people find themselves in when they have a kidney stone)

SO which one is it going to be?
I am scared, but at the same time I am cautiously optimistic that i am out of the woods.

Has anyone else had this problem - where you were told you have a kidney stone but the pain just magically disappears on its one without any monumental torturous experience??

please say yes. please say yes.

the stress of worrying is bad for me.

It also makes me feel like a crazy lunatic when i am at work becasue i just cant seem to stay focused. That whole "pregnancy brain" thing....that is not a myth.

I am having such a hard time keeping all of the details in my life straight. I can't remember so many things that used to be a lot easier tasks to tackle. i would say that i hope that things get easier and i can get back into the swing of things in a few months but that seems pretty unlikely once you add a baby into the mix.

soooo this post could ramble on all day if i don't put a lid on it. I need to close this up and start trying to remember all fo the things that i know i am forgetting to do...and hopefully i can also work on the part where i forget that an imminent attack is coming where my kidney basically explodes and knifes my insides.

happy Tuesday!